Mr. Octopush: Acridity in a Basic Story

Given my inability to actually sit down and materialize my thoughts into a recognizable and digestible story, I decided that I'd baby-step it and start with a children's picture book. The great thing about picture books - besides their obvious shortness - is that the goal is clearly defined. With an end product pinned visibly in my brain, I can confidently plan how I want to construct it in plain step-by-step fashion. And with pictures books, all my hard work can be confirmed every time I watch my"mouse-stroke" or my color-blending build my goal brick by brick. The hours of my life I spend are validated by a progress I can easily measure with a checklist. With picture books, I don't get disheartened like I sometimes do when I'm writing, when I feel like I'm expected to glibly lace every darn word with layers and layers of wit and introspection that sound so artificial. When I'm writing anything serious, I feel like a boy straining myself on the tip of my toes, craning to see every corner of the world from the height of a man's armpits. I mean, sure I feel a little taller, but I feel cramps too. And was I really that much taller than the other kids; did I see anything that they couldn't already? What did those few inches I so contorted myself to steal really mean to me?

Bah, I don't even know what I'm talking about now (except that I feel like I'm lacing my words again haha). Anyways, without further rambling, here's the kiddie story.

--//--

Mr. Octopush and his friend, Mr. Pear, are in front of poster advertising their middle school's talent show. Mr. Octopush admits to his friend that he's actually considered entering as a singer. Mr. Pear laughs, telling him that he can't sing. 

Just then Ms. Eraser jumps in. As the school's most recognized singer, she snidely informs Mr. Octopush that if anyone is going to steal the show it's going to be her. She then touts that she can probably lull the whole school to sleep with her mellifluous voice alone if she tried. Mr. Octopush cracks that that's not a very amazing feat with half the school already half asleep anyway. [Polite chuckle]. He and Mr. Pear roar with laughter. Ms. Eraser airily dismisses the two's existence before walking away, leaving Mr. Pear to try to dissuade Mr. Octopush from entering. Mr. Octopush adamantly refuses, determined to not only win  school recognition for himself but more importantly knock Ms. Eraser down a few pegs. Mr. Pear concedes and decides to help Mr. Octopush out as "Eye of the Tiger" naturally revs up in the background.

To help prepare for the talent show, Mr. Pear offers the help of his mom who is not only a high school chorus teacher but was also once part of an a cappella group, Gin and the Fruit Bowl, when she was in college. Mama Pear agrees to help coach Mr. Octopush, but only if Mr. Pear assumes some of her typical household chores as she is a busy mother. Mr. Pear reluctantly agrees, hoping the best for his friend.

Mama Octopush is also supportive of her son and agrees to drive him to his friend's house every afternoon for singing lessons. She also arranges some of family and friends to listen to Mr. Octopush perform to not only prepare him for the crowd but also to show their support. While Mr. Octopush admittedly does not sound that great, they hear some improvement over the weeks. Grampy Octopush   even offers him some seaweed oil that purportedly would improve his voice. Mr. Octopush politely declines.

Meanwhile, Ms. Eraser, confident of herself does not prepare for the show. She lazes around, eating chocolates and yelling at the T.V. during exciting soccer games. She does however pick out a dress to wear for the talent show.

Soon, the big day arrives. The contestants begin performing what they consider to be talents. Finally, it is Mr. Octopush's turn. He is nervous but he has prepared weeks for this. With growing confidence he opens his mouth and...

"Gurgle, goorgle, GURGLRRRRRR!"

The sound is barely bearable. He finishes his song, and everyone is silent. Mr. Octopush is devastated. Ms. Eraser yawns dismissively backstage. Suddenly Mr. Pear and the rest of the Pear and Octopush family stand up and wildly applaud for him. A weak applause flutters from the rest of audience; most wear polite smiles.

Ms. Eraser replaces him on the stage. Dusting of her sparkling blue dress, she takes a sweeping look at  the audience. She did not anticipate for there to be so many people. A little unnerved, she quickly and professionally regains her composure before exhaling a beautiful song, enchanting the whole audience and rapturing even Mr. Octopush himself. She then ends her song, coolly leaving the stage as the audience gives her a standing ovation. 

After a few more acts, the judges quiet the audience to crown the winner: Ms. Eraser.

The whole crowd cheers as Ms. Eraser performs her scripted thanks and bows. Backstage, Mr. Octopush is sulking. "But I worked real hard...I followed my dream and honestly believed in myself too. That's not how things are supposed to go! Is the American dream all a lie?!"

Out of nowhere, the Mr. Pear and the rest of the family come up with flowers, hugs, and white-out for that dialogue. They shower Mr. Octopush with praise, patting him proudly on the back and high-fiving him for a job well done. Suddenly, Mr. Octopush does not feel so bad.

So while Mr. Octopush may not have won the talent show, he was already a winner: He's got the love and support of an awesomesauce family and friends that can be said in a more eloquent way. The End!

--//--

I know, it's not the most inspiring story; there was definitely a lack of butterfly-filled cupcakes falling from rainbow clouds at the end. But I think it stays close to its French inspiration which, if you ask any French student, is pretty depressing. And to neutralize this post's admittedly bitter tone (haha sorry 'bout that), I promise to write a more appealing one next time.